My name is Joe Starr. I am a comedian
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And I mean that in the best way possible.
1987’s Masters of the Universe starring Dolph Lundgren is a terrible mess, but it’s also a fairly brave and fun terrible mess: Hey, here’s a barbarian and his friends that have laser guns and their tiny wizard friend that opens dimensional portals with a Casio and they’re fighting a guy named Skeletor and also Marty McFly’s principal and Courtney Cox are there.
Hell, the first line of the movie is this: “At the center of the Universe, at the border between Light and Dark, stands Castle Greyskull.” What? What does that even mean? Do you care? I don’t. This sounds awesome and I want to watch it as hard as I can.
If this sounds stupid to you, you’re wrong and I feel sorry for you. You know what else sounds sort of stupid? Every King Arthur legend. Greek mythology. But if you can’t get on board with the search for the Holy Grail and Titans, I don’t really don’t know what to tell you.
Thor 2 begins with a similarly absurd premise, and you’re either on board or you’re not. If you’re on board, you’re about to get a really fun space viking adventure full of weird bad guys with laser lances and stealth planes, General Space Thugs (the cosmic version of multicultural gangs), and Sif. SIF.
Negative reviews tend to be universally echoing three sentiments, and all of them have just made me shake my head and feel bad for the reviewer.
1. The science is weak. lol
2. Dark Elves? Seriously? Why did the villain choice take people by surprise? We’re now in our third installment of SPACE VIKING WITH MAGIC HAMMER FROM A NORSE STAR WARS PLANET. Thor 2 was not going to be about Wallstreet ethics.
3. I miss The Dark Knight. I don’t think I can read another self important paragraph mourning the loss of the ‘Chris Nolan serious superhero film.’
For one thing, a review shouldn’t ‘fantasy book’ a movie. If a movie has a fun tone, it should be judged as to whether or not it entertained by the tone it attempted. I didn’t compare Inglorious Basterds to Saving Private Ryan.
For two things, The Dark Knight isn’t a very good movie, guys. It’s a tedious stretch held together by a series of brilliant and legendary Heath Ledger performances. For proof, please take my ‘Good Dark Knight scenes that didn’t have the Joker in them’ test. It’s an easy test. Name a good scene from The Dark Knight that didn’t involve The Joker. Please don’t try hard because I don’t want your brain to bleed.
Do you know what you get if you completely remove Heath from Nolan’s Batman movies? You get The Dark Knight Rises. You get Man of Steel. But are movies with a few likable elements that completely drowned in their own super serious fart juice.
Thor is an insane amount of fun, from a solid group of creators that know exactly what you want in a Thor movie: Thor beating the hell out of stuff and smiling about it, puzzlement over why he likes Jane more than Sif, Darcy zingers, and LOKI. Thor: The Dark World delivers buckets of it. Enjoy the movie, and as Dolph Lundgren said to James Tolkan after they defeated the forces of Skeletor and Tolkan decided to be a Prince in Eternia or something, Good Journey.